Back and Happier

I really should update more often, even though I don't even know whether anyone is still reading this! I know my last entries were pretty depressing, but everything is a million times better now. I've been living in my new place for almost 4 months now (longer than my last place!) and I absolutely love it. I love not having to deal with roomates and their drama. I love having an entire place where everything belongs to me. I love being able to do whatever I want, whenever I want and not worry about disturbing anyone or worry what they think of me. I love that I can throw my stuff anywhere without it being in anyone's way. I love that if I don't get around to cleaning for a couple days, no one else can complain. I love that I can have anyone visit whenever I want. I love that I have the freedom to decorate however I want. I love that I'm in a safe, quiet neighborhood that is away from the craziness of the city, but that everything I need is within walking distance. I love that right at the end of the street is a clean, gorgeous, uncrowded beach. But mostly I love how happy and stress-free I am. I never expected to be able to afford a place like this, and I know how lucky I am that it all came together this way thanks to a great friend. I feel like I'm finally able to be the person I want to be because I don't have other people around all the time making me feel like less of a person, and that has made such a difference. Looking back, I see so clearly how completely miserable I was before and how that affected my personality. I didn't like who I was when I was with them, and because of that, I withdrew, not just from them but from everybody. Only one person knew how bad it was for me there, because I wouldn't tell anyone else. I think I was afraid that it was my fault and that I should be able to fix it. So many people who heard the details were shocked at what those two thought about me- that I was antisocial and too quiet and unfriendly and unwelcoming. Outside of that apartment, I wasn't that type of person at all. And now that I'm here and I never have to see them again (hopefully!) I'm the happy, friendly, welcoming person that everyone else sees.

Ditto

I dont know why that got published twice and I dont have the patience right now to fix it.

The Year in Review

So 2006 is just about over. I thought about doing this whole detailed summary of the past year. However, upon reflection, 2006 was a horrible year that I dont want to re-live in vivid detail. So here's the Cliff Notes version:

2006 began with a suicide, ended with the death of my beloved dog, and somewhere in there I lost one of my closest friends and moved from one crappy living situation to another. Although a big promotion at work helped to ease the pain, not to mention finance my new apartment, which I will be moving into during the first few weeks of 2007, it was not enough to balance out the complete and utter suckiness of the past year. So there you go. It is time for this year to be over and done with. Auld Lang Syne everyone....whatever the hell that means.

The Year in Review

So 2006 is just about over. I thought about doing this whole detailed summary of the past year. However, upon reflection, 2006 was a horrible year that I dont want to re-live in vivid detail. So here's the Cliff Notes version:

2006 began with a suicide, ended with the death of my beloved dog, and somewhere in there I lost one of my closest friends and moved from one crappy living situation to another. Although a big promotion at work helped to ease the pain, not to mention finance my new apartment, which I will be moving into during the first few weeks of 2007, it was not enough to balance out the complete and utter suckiness of the past year. So there you go. It is time for this year to be over and done with. Auld Lang Syne everyone....whatever the hell that means.

Packing Again

Ok, well it seems like the only time I update this thing is when something big happens....

So in keeping with that tradition....

I'm moving again.

Yup, again.

After living in the new place awhile, I wasn't all that happy with it, for many reasons....random roomates I never see, mail issues, and the latest, mice. Then I came home from work the other day to find a For Sale sign out front. And no, the landlord did not, and still has not, said a word to me about it. Chances are that it won't sell for quite awhile, but there's always that possibility. And whoever buys it probably won't want to keep tenants. So as of now, I'm looking at new places. Luckily, my financial situation is better than it was for the last apartment search, so I'm thinking of getting a studio, thus eliminating ALL potential roomate issues. I don't know if I want to stay in Quincy or go someplace new, but I spent a long time on craiglist tonight searching the entire south shore. I've gotten a few responses, so I'm going to start setting up appointments to look at other places. In the meantime, if anyone knows of anything, let me know.

As soon as I know where I'm going, I'll let everyone know.

My, How Things Change....

For those of you still trying to figure it out (Its a challenge, I know) I'm finally at a point where things are finalized.
To catch you up:
Three weeks ago my roomate informed me that she was moving out and that our other roomate was thinking about moving. We all got into a big discussion in which I was basically blamed for everything.
I started interviewing new roomates, met some good people and was all set to offer the rooms to two of them. In the meantime, the current roomates (him in particular) had been doing everything possible to make me miserable. Then when I asked them both for an exact date of their departures, they said (well, he said, but she didnt contradict him) that they wanted to stay and kick me out. When I said he had no right he said that if I stayed, he would make my life miserable til I chose to leave. He also threatened to tell the people I was interviewing that I was a horrible roomate so that they wouldnt want to live with me either.
So then I went to the landlords, who decided that to be as fair as possible, since neither of them had given a definite answer about leaving, that she would get first choice since she was there longest, then it would go to me. They also told him that if he continued to threaten and harass me, they would kick him out immediately.
So a few days went by, and then she made her decision. She was going to stay and I had a month and a half to move out.

So then I started looking at apartments, met some nice people, met some completely insane people, and last night I found a place that I absolutely love.

I should be able to move out of this hell-hole by next weekend. Hallelujah!


If nothing else, even though I've lost a friend (although she somehow seems to think that we'll still be friends after all this) I've also realized who my truest friends are- the ones who have been right there for me throughout this whole mess...and who have even offered to help me move into the new place!

So I guess it isnt a total loss. I really love the new place and even though I'll miss this apartment (notice that I specified the place itself, not the people living in it!) I feel so much better than I have in awhile. This whole thing was a long time coming, and I've known for months that something wasnt right between us. Now the burden is lifted and I can start making a new life for myself without either of them in it.

Help!!

Anyone out there who still actually reads this (I have no idea who is!): I need two new roomates! Long story short, one decided to move out as soon as possible, the other decided that if roomie #1 was going and I was staying, that they were both leaving. So I've been searching frantically for the past day and a half (cuz I was the last to find out this bit of news) and now I'm begging any of you who are looking for a place or know someone else who is looking for a place to get in touch with me. Thanks!!

Its Nice to Be Missed

Its been awhile, I know. Things have been busy with the promotion and other work stuff. I just went back to work today after taking my only real "vacation" for the year (we dont get paid for time off so I try to keep it minimal) which wasnt much of a vacation since I was back in Franklin painting faces at Rocco all weekend. But anyway, today I saw my kids for the first time in a week, which doesnt seem like much, but definitely had an impact on them. My first session, he was so happy to see me that he started clapping as soon as I walked in the door. My next little guy had spent the weekend asking for me, and then when he found out I was coming today he spent the morning watching out the window for me. Then I went to Seana's.... and it was a different story. She had mixed feelings- she was happy to see me, but she was also mad at me for leaving her. So she spent the afternoon going back and forth between giving me the cold shoulder and not wanting to be apart from me. She did this last year too. After a day or two she should be back to her old lovable self. In a way its nice that she gets this emotional about someone, since she never used to have a real connection with anyone, even her family. She's a totally different kid than she was when I met her almost two years ago (I can't believe its been that long!) Its so awesome to see the change and know that I played a role.

Think You Know Me?

Stole this from someone...just a fun little game.

15 Things You May Not Know About Me

1. When I roll out of bed in the morning my first thought is usually either "Can I sleep a little longer?" or "Yay I get to work with (insert kids name here) today!"

2. I have a mild obsession with flipflops...and approximately 20 pairs or so to date.

3. My life now is nothing like I thought it would be 5 years ago: I thought I would be teaching in the suburbs, living on my own (also in the suburbs), involved in a L.T.R. (if you dont know, guess), and going on vacation once in a while. Instead I'm working in a different field which I absolutely love, living in a city on a beach with good friends, still waiting, and rarely even taking a day off let alone a vacation. But for the record, I dont regret any of it (except maybe the lack of LTR which kinda sucks).

4. Friends have come and gone, but I know I'm better off without the ones that have gone, and all the more grateful for the ones who have stayed.

5. My favorite book is Jane Eyre but I also have a weakness for light, fluffy fiction and/or romance novels.

6. I have 3 birthmarks, one of which very few people have ever seen.

7. My goal is to marry a Red Sox player :P (but I'll settle for a die-hard fan).

8. Now that I'm living on a beach I cant imagine living somewhere that isnt near an ocean.

9. My dog is one of the most important people in my life.

10. My toes are usually painted either hot pink or a shade of purple.

11. I love gerbera daisies and orchids and I absolutely HATE stargazer lillies.

12. Fashion mags and chocolate are my guilty pleasures.

13. Coffee is a necessity.

14. I'm closer to my family than most people my age that I know.

15. I still love (and have most of) my stuffed animals and other childhood toys